Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Best bad movies

In memory of Patrick Swayze and his role in the greatest bad movie of all time, I've got to talk about the greatest terrible movies of all time. This is the opposite of the well made movies that are just no fun to watch, thanks Benjamin Button, but you're terrible in spite of your high production values.

Coming in at number 5:

Bruce Willis could populate this list all by himself, what with all of the awful action movies and utter cheese on his resume, but his biggest ratio of poor quality to enjoyability has to be Hudson Hawk. Lame story, bad acting, outlandish premise, but somehow a really good time. Danny Aiello plays his sidekick in a buddy-criminal comedy that gets a mastermind burglar back into the game after he serves time in prison at the behest of the Vatican. Yeah.

4:

Face/Off is John Travolta's contribution to this world of fun movies that are just terrible. Sure, he's got some great movies like Pulp Fiction and Get Shorty, balanced with a lot of terrible movies like Look Who's Talking and Battlefield Earth. But Travolta and company manage that perfect balance of good and bad with a story of cops and robbers trading rolls through surgery.

3:

Star-studded often spells bad news since the budget goes to salaries and blowing stuff up and rarely to good writers. S.W.A.T. manages to take a bad script and turn it into the second most-enjoyable Colin Farrell movie. A crimelord offers a huge reward for anyone who can spring him from prison. A classic older cop (Samuel Jackson) has organized a SWAT team made up of officers who don't fit in to the normal cop mold and they are charged with guarding this particular inmate. You can see how this would be utter cheese, but is somehow a decent ride in spite of the terrible idea and some mediocre acting.

2:

Mr. Jackson is actually in many movies that are enjoyably bad, and in two of my favorite awful films. His other appearance on this list is a little shoot-em-up with Vin Diesel called xXx. It's the story of an extreme athlete who gets recruited by the government for a covert espionage mission in Eastern Europe. How could this possibly be any good? They manage to make the pacing work and the elaborately strange story a lot of fun.

1: The greatest bad movie ever has to be:

Patrick Swayze and Keanu Reeves team up with some inspired insanity from Gary Busey for Point Break. Maybe it is partly due to the fact that I was 14 when it came out, but I love watching this FBI caper of an undercover agent trying to infiltrate a surfer community to find bank robbers... and ends up finding himself along the way.
That has got to be one of the cheesiest premises that anyone could ever conceive, yet it works without hesitation from beginning to end. Fast paced, action packed and lacking any discernible reason to have ever been made, Point Break is one of the most enjoyable movies ever. Even with the surreal skydive from somewhere in outer space judging by the amount of time in freefall, it is great fun.

I know there are a lot of enjoyable bad movies out there, so hit the comments with your own favorites.

2 Comments:

Blogger Phucas said...

Yeah, most things with Swayze and Reeves are bad. "Benjamin Button" bad too.

But many bad ones you mentioned look pretty good compared to "Plan Nine from Outer Space" (1959). I mean it. Older sci-fi movies may be the worst.

If you're into the bad movie genre, maybe you've seen it. Though it's more likely you've seen Johnny Depp's "Ed Wood" (1994), a movie about the "Plan Nine" director. The Depp movie was a kick.

The real director Ed Wood Jr. is entirely incompetent as a moviemaker in the same way celebrated local auteur Jonathan Cross is inept.

Of course, "Plan Nine" is so amateurish it's fun to watch -- at least it was in the 1980s when I first saw it.

But after my wife Bobbi and I saw it recently at a movie theater, I think that will be the last time.

Recommended bad film books:

"The Psychotronic Encyclopedia of Film" (Michael Weldon)

"The Golden Turkey Awards" (Harry and Michael Medved)

-Keith

October 3, 2009 at 10:31 AM 
Blogger Unknown said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

May 3, 2010 at 3:38 AM 

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